Enjoying a beer and checking the map in Taormina, Sicily

Re: Why I Do It

Hi Dave,

Your point is a good one, but the reality is exactly the opposite. Not
knowing where things are or even what thing are worth visiting in a
new place is a big frustration. It just ain't the case on the ship
most of the time, or it's a case of mind over matter. (If you don't
mind, it doesn't matter). Here's why.

The one day port call is for checking out a new place, nothing more or
less! The top tier cruise lines know this and make it very easy.
Remember the high level of service you are paying for on these ships.
This extends to support in port. Often, a half day or full day
excursion from the ship--recommended for "exotic" locations where
wandering around might be impractical or for attractions distant to
the port--will do the trick for a quick look at the "top" sight that
can be further explored on a future lengthy visit or often just to
"see" a place you probably didn't expect to ever set foot in and
definitely not want to be on one's own in. Examples of the former
might be, say, a port call at Granada, Spain for a day excursion to
Granada and a dedicated visit to the Alhambra. The call at Malaga
would be very different than traveling for a week or more in Spain,
but you'd at least see what the Alhambra is all about. I prefer full
day excursions when they concentrate on a special attraction, but I
avoid the excursions that combine many sights but add a long lunch.

Alternatively, on the last cruise we took the local train from the
port of Civitavecchia to Rome (the tour desk on the ship had schedules
and prices) and explored this somewhat familiar city for as long that
day as we wanted since the ship was in port until midnight. It was a
nice visit for Barbara who had not been there before as we "hit" the
four major tourist attractions. We deemed that an all day excursion to
Rome from the ship was inappropriate, by the way, since a whirlwind
visit that included one hour in the Vatican Museum would be just
frustrating. I avoid the ship excursions that include museum stops, as
a rule, since it is usually easier to get a cab at the port or have
the ship's tour concierge arrange a private car if there's "something"
I just have to see. But ship's excursions are the first choice for
newcomers. Silversea runs a video continuously with descriptions and
photos of the attractions of each port and guidelines for visiting
them as well as for the tours offered.

Examples of the "exotic" cruise port visits abound on the small ship
itineraries. We made the one day excursion from Port Said to Cairo and
spent the day at the step (older) and pointy (not quite as old but
more famous) pyramids. Chances are that you and I are beyond the time
of bopping to Egypt on our own for independent exploration. Barbara
saw the major sights in Jerusalem with no hassle on her all day
excursion from Ashdod, and of course in past years I've been to Dar Es
Salem, Aden, obscure islands in the Maldives, and taken weird and
fascinating trains in Indonesia and Majorca. These are activities that
would have taken some planning and even knowing they existed and being
able to book them while I was there on independent travel there might
not have been possible. Ship offered half day excursions usually give
you a mindless view of what the place is about, and then you can go
back into the town after lunch on board and explore further until "all
aboard time".

Cruises allow you to go BACK for to places you've never expected to
have seen even once. Seeing Taormina again was lovely. However, I
doubt I would have gone independently in Sicily this year--there are
so many other destinations to check out--and if I were to be in Sicily
on my own I would probably not have the time or inclination revisit a
place I had already been. But this stop allowed me to be able to take
that cab up to Caselmola, something I had wanted to do "the next time
I was there." We also had a beer in a cafe and watched at Sicilian
wedding. All those black suits. Just being there is often most of the
fun. We choose walking around Taormina, taking the cab, and drinking
the beer instead of a drive up Mt. Etna on a tour. What's there to
discuss. I'd rather smell marzipan than sulfur.

The point of my essay is that a one day (or even a ship's overnight)
visit to a place on a cruise should be approached as an entirely
completely different opportunity than a hotel stay on one's own. Yes,
there are limitations of arriving on a ship that usually arrives at 8
am and leaves at 6 pm, but some research before leaving home and the
shipboard lectures and pre-cruise briefing materials usually provide
enough information. You can choose a ship provided excursion, wander
the town (the "S" lines usually provide free shuttle buses to the
center of town if walking from the port isn't practical) or purposely
hitting one or two tourist sites if you want. But it's very satisfying
to just sit in a cafe saying, "Wow, I'm having an ouzo in a taverna in
too hot but very sleepy Gythion, wherever that is, and now it's time
to go back to the ship for dinner." My technique is to find an
activity that is practical and appropriate in each port. I plan in
advance for an orientation or lengthy ship's excursion, a long walk in
the city (a visit to Lisbon comes to mind where I visited the Tourist
Bureau and asked for a tram ride that was particularly interesting,
and it was), or even buy an all day transit pass and ride the metro to
an outlying park to take a hike, as I did--twice--in visits to Oslo.
In most ports, Silversea and I suspect the other "S" lines, brings on
a local tourist bureau representative who will give you a map, tell
you where the bus stop is at the port and more importantly how to pay
for it, and work out a quick itinerary for whatever you want to do. A
little review of a guide book before leaving home helps this method to
be very satisfying. But just walking the back alleys of some medieval
city you've never heard of and ignoring the museums because the
weather is so nice and, look, there's a nice cafe for a
unpronounceable brand beer is very nice, too.

Visiting by ship is a different experience, and understanding that to
make the most of it usually results in as good or better an experience
than the hotel visit. But it is different and trying to make one way
of visiting into the other can be a way of disappointing yourself.
Understanding the difference of a ship's call can result in an
extraordinary and fantastic experience. Sometimes you find that you
don't need to ever see a place again. (See my notes on Limassol.) And
yes, I've been to India for a total now of about three weeks. It was
very different from visiting independently, for sure, but I've
accumulated three days in Bombay, Goa, Mangalore, and Cuchin. I think
I've seen a bit of that wonderful country, and did it in great style
and with a lot less stress.

Hope this helps. I will be most interested in helping you choose a
"first timers" cruise line, ship, and itinerary. Maybe come along and
introduce you to the bartenders. Now, that takes some orientation.

Best,

Mike

On Fri, Jul 15, 2011 at 4:38 AM, David Borenstein
<dborenstein@verizon.net> wrote:
> Mike:  Your essay was most interesting to read and, I suspect, rewarding for
> you to write.  I plan to read it again.  You, too, might want to revisit the
> subject since we all change over time, as do our likes and dislikes.  I
> agree with you that 'it's the ship', even though I've never been on a
> cruise.  The ports of call are important too, but there are better ways to
> get to know these places.  My (admittedly more limited) traveling experience
> has taught me that the first day in a new place, however fascinating, is
> usually marred by not knowing your way around.  To me, that's the weakest
> link in a cruise...every port visit is a first day.  I still hope to take a
> cruise while I'm still on my feet, and you'll be a most valuable resource in
> helping choose an appropriate one.
>
> Dave

An Essay On THE EXPERIENCE Of The Luxury Cruise

Wednesday, 13 July 2011 - Boulder, Colorado, USA

THE MEANING OF IT ALL: THE EXPERIENCE OF THE LUXURY CRUISE

INTRODUCTION

My original plan was to post some pictures and make some sarcastic (but good natured) observations about, 1) The Australian Group, and 2) The Peterson family and perhaps, just perhaps, make fun of some of the very, very rich folks who pepper the guest list on some of the luxury cruise itineraries. I remember that cartoon characters would be shown making a decision with a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other, there both to whisper polar opposite moral advice in the character's ears. You might guess which might cause me to place a few pictures at the top of this essay including, say, one of a member of Captain's Choice group martialing for an excursion in the 3nd week of being together with THREE (3) marks of the group: the ever present label pin, a Group name tag, and to top it off a full picture ID card. Maybe I could be inclined by the dark spirit to also post a picture of the yellow shirted organizers with their group waiting for their private buses, or perhaps include a picture of a portion of the ship completely occupied by this close knit bunch of antipodal groupies. The contrary shoulder spirit might move me to include a picture or two of the ever jolly but oddly misplaced bunch of Ozzie and Harriet inspired Peterson's enjoying their own company as well. Of course, wouldn't it be devil inspired to present documentation of the early morning coffee/tea service soiled by a guest who had put their tea remnants and trash on the tray for clean cups and glasses tray and had also apparently carelessly bumped the sign to the wrong tray so that others might be moved do the same? That would be giving in to the dark side, indeed.

But maybe the angel might be encouraging me to use these snapshots to help illustrate what the Silversea experience is all about. That is, what is it that has attracted me and kept me doing this sort of thing for now 422 days on Silversea alone (but who's counting) and earlier some 200 days as guest and enrichment lecturer on Seven Seas Cruises long ago?


WHAT ARE THE "S" CRUISE LINES?

Silversea Cruises, Regent, Radisson, or just plain Seven Seas Cruise Line (the prefix on the name is still changing based on ownership), Seaborne, Sea Dream Yacht Club (really), Crys(sss)tal Cruises, and probably a few more with the "S" sound (kind of like mattress companies for reasons not clear) have a miniscule portion the so-called "cruise" market. These companies are small, although Seven Seas and Seaborne are subsidiaries, or more correctly, brands within larger mass-market cruise lines. All the "S" lines operate very small numbers of ships. Seven Seas has three ships, Crystal two, Sea Dream also two. Luxury line ships are very small by any measure. The largest Crystal ship—this line is really in the "medium luxury sized ship" category--has a maximum of about 1200 guests, but each of Sea Dream's two ships have capacities of 110 guests, as does Silversea's super luxurious "expedition" ship. All the "S" line ships sail with almost as many crew members as guests. There are no less than 3 crew members for every 4 guests when these ships are absolutely full. Often there are more crew members than guests when the ships sail at somewhat less than full capacity. The Silversea Explorer (formally named most unfortunately for those that know more than just the name of the Prince of Monaco, Prince Albert II) has a ratio when full of 1.1 crew to guests.

All the "S" ships, however, are very big for their capacity. The Silversea twins, Silver Shadow and Silver Whisper, are each 610 feet long and hold at full capacity only 382 guests. By comparison, a newer "smaller sized" mass market ship, Holland-America's Nieuw Amsterdam, is 936 feet long but sails with 2106 guests when full. Princess Cruises' Emerald Princess is 951 feet long and sails full with 3100 guests and 1200 crew. That, by the way, reflects a typical mass market guest to crew ratio of 2 to 2.5 to 1. And the two Royal Caribbean International super ships, Oasis and Allure of the Seas, are both 1187 feet long and each holds 6359 of one's closest friends if you are on board. These two monsters are almost 20% too big to transit the Panama Canal and can only dock at a handful of purpose built "cruise ports". You might recall a moderate sized mass market ship that had to be towed from Mexico to the USA because no small port could handle evacuating the couple of thousand passengers who thus had subsequently to endure US Navy Spam and no toilets for a couple of days until reaching a port big enough to tie down and that could amass the dozens of buses necessary to take these refugees to a nearby airport with sufficient capacity to take all of them home. The small "S" ships, of course, have small numbers of total guests and crew and are small enough to be able to visit out of the way locations (or empty the ship of guests, if necessary) in a handful of trips on their usually two tenders which are actually the larger of the two sets of lifeboats. Silverseas' ships usually have two tenders plus two smaller lifeboats tucked away from any passengers'cabins. In constrast, even the mid-sized mass market cruise ships might have twelve or more boats on EACH SIDE of the vessel, many cabins with limited views out the windows, and of course the dreaded "inside cabins". The certainly less than huge Emerald Princess has 16 lifeboats running along the entire length of each side of the ship. A recent docking of Silver Cloud alongside Emerald Princess made the Silversea ship look like one of Emerald's lifeboat. The small ships, of course, don't require tender reservations or serpentine queues for entering and exiting the ship at each port.


NO CLIMBING WALLS HERE UNLESS YOU WANT TO CLIMB THE WALLS

There are obvious but more important, subtle consequences of the size and crew ratio differences between the luxury line experience versus the mass market cruise "product". Yes, there are no queues for anything on the small luxury ships.You usually enter and exit the ship at each port "at will" as would be for any hotel. Embarking (check-in) is similar. You walk up, get your security picture taken (not like an hotel but necessary since your key card links to the security system of the ship). This is usually a no wait, brief experience as you sip a champagne handed to you by a butler. A butler! The dinning rooms resemble gourmet restaurants on land in every respect, well except for the different views out the window each meal. Unlike the big ship's traditional experience, the small ships provide open and unassigned seating always, and only the very intimate specialized small restaurants on-board might require an advance booking. The little Silver Wind, with a maximum of 296 guests, has four dining venues for dinner plus 24 hour full service room service.

Oh, I almost forgot, these products usually include a real no tipping policy. Drinks (water, wine, liquor, and every thing else potable in the bars, restaurants, at the pool, and in your mini-bar and fridge), mostly all specialty restaurants, and even some or all excursions are included in the one cruise price. Expect innovative cooked to order food (Silversea now features "slow cooking" sous vide methods when appropriate), no questioning of special orders for almost anything. There's no need to reserve deck chairs. The pool attendants will set up an infinite number of additional lounge chairs at the pool upon request (although some nationalities like to place random library books on their chairs as a cat marks its territory and deplete the library of all the books by authors whose name starts with "A" or whatever section is nearest the door. Oh well.) The usual catch phrase is that the crew "can't say 'no', although unfortunately there can be some confusion when the answer to some guests' requests can not be 'yes' (as when one guest insisted on Pringles during a Pacific Ocean crossing.) You get the point.

OK, so you say, it's like a Ritz Carlton that moves you to cool places every day? Well, yes. Is that the big difference with this "S" ships? Well, yes that's true, but that's not the point. That's not why I do it. Let me work a bit harder so that you don't really miss what I'm trying to say. Consider that the crew has memorized your name (from that security photo) the first night, not to impress you but because they have been briefed on your preferences for EVERYTHING before hand. My lactose free pastries are available where I have my morning coffee THE FIRST MORNING, and the butler already is afraid of what I might publish when we first come on-board. (But that's my profile.) Think of it, you can say, "Oh, can I have rack of lamb tomorrow? I see it's not on the menu", and it's there the next evening. The waiter wherever you sit just knows and tells you that the lamb is there if you still want it. One of the dozen or so chefs ran out of full galley at the buffet each lunch I chose to eat there (rather than the Dining Room, Pool Grill, or room service where other chefs might do the same) and pointed out the items with dairy in them and offered to make me a lactose free version of each right then and there. The Talmud says that you can't prove anything by giving examples, but perhaps now you are getting at least a glimpse of what the on-board experience is on the super luxury class small ships.

Of course, the mass market small to huge ships are convenient "no packing and unpacking" transportation in some sort of basic to very extensive resort hotel. Although I've been to maybe 3/4th of my 133 countries visited (but who's counting) via luxury cruise, the ship rather than a collection of ports is the destination. It also takes you to various places to spend the day. As they say on the one PA announcement each day on Silversea over and over, "Once Again", the ship is really the experience. Of course, the ports are an important component of the experience and often provide a great diversion each day, and being on a ship and watching arrivals and departures or sitting on the deck in the evening or after dinner and having a drink while watching the land recede is way cool. Again, the ship is the destination, and it moves you from one place to another you might be interested in seeing, OR NOT. As you've read from my very low key and hidden messages in my blogs, sometimes there is some frustration with crew members who can't say "no" when the answer really can not be "yes", and some of the guests who are not used to being in the presence of others who may be equally used to being top dog are sometimes not at their best, but in general the "S" line luxury cruise experience is what I have become addicted to: the Shipboard Experience first, the Port Stops or more accurately the Itinerary (more about how this factors in below) second, and then being on an Actual Sea Vessel (that is, watching the arrivals and departures, the sea itself, even the weather). It all adds up, and there are no climbing walls.

But what is it that so great in this product, if there aren't the advertised big ship "amenities" (It's not more than a cruise ship. It's a cruise ship!) and it's not an alternative to other means of transportation?


UNLIKE DURING PASSOVER, THERE ARE ONLY THREE QUESTIONS

If you haven't ever taken this kind of cruise, now you are dying to ask me The Three Questions: 1) Aren't you bored when you're not in port?, 2) Do you get seasick?, and 3) Do you have to dress up?

Note: question 2) above is can be accompanied by a penguin like movement if not by an admission that the questioner "always" gets motion sick and will not be able to take a cruise. Never. Don't even ask, you say. Read on.

ANSWERING THE THREE QUESTIONS, BUT FIRST SOMETHING ELSE

To answer the THREE QUESTIONS, I have to start first talking a bit about the itinerary.

The cruise itineraries are just about how everyone picks any cruise. I like small and exotic places that can't be gotten to conveniently independently and also places I really want to spend a little time in. I know this sounds contradictory. All cruises can only give you a glimpse or at best an orientation to places that you might want to spend a few days at another time by flying in (or taking a train, as we do in Europe) and to enjoy the evenings and early mornings. Sailing out of Bombay just as the fireworks on the night of Diwali were just beginning to go off was most frustrating if otherwise enchanting. Having to make the multi-hour bus ride back to Casablanca from Marrakech just as the Jamaa el Fnaa Square was coming to life was dreadful. But in the first case I was about to sail to Gibraltar and in the second to cross the Arabian Sea to Oman. This is the perfect travel means for those of us with short attention spans coupled with a high sense of wonder.

Get it? IT'S DIFFERENT. Thinking of the luxury cruise as transport is like thinking of a hot air balloon ride as…. Whoops. I'll work on that one. Maybe comparing visiting Yosemite and staying at the Ahwahnee Lodge compared to trekking the Appalachian Trail, or visiting the fantastic gourmet food market at the Ferry Building in San Francisco versus a quick stop at a 7/11. OK, already. I'm done with the analogies, I think. Thank you, I needed that.

OK, IT'S NOT A MEANS OF TRANSPORT BUT TRAVELING THOUSANDS OF MILES TO VERY NIFTY PLACES. SO HOW DO I CHOOSE AN ITINERARY THAT WILL MAXIMIZE THE VALUE OF THE CRUISE?

Let me start answering question number one (that boredom question) by addressing choosing luxury cruise itineraries. That is, you start the process of going on one of these cruises usually by picking the cruise segment or segments based on itinerary—but it's not properly done quite the way you think. I really enjoy, for example, the Sydney to Singapore cruises. I really enjoy seeing Sydney and Singapore again, cities I'm pretty familiar with by this time, I like to snorkel the Barrier Reef, and this itinerary meets my preferred default scheme of, 1) warm weather, 2) westward travel to avoid 23 hour days and have some 25 hour days (that time zone thing—it's not jet lag but rather a way of having a late evening lemoncello and watching the next morning's early docking), and 3) has a few strings of sea days thrown in. (More on that in a minute.) That isn't to say, that the London to Montreal cruise I did about 7 years ago that included Iceland and Greenland wasn't one of my favorites, ever, or that this last Western European port intensive cruise was anything but way up there in my experience. What I am saying is that the itinerary that works best is the mix of exotic or alternatively familiar ports, days at sea to enjoy the ship experience, and other factors that make the entire experience as comfortable or as adventurous as I want. These are the criteria for choosing each cruise on the luxury small ship product.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but the "ideal" itinerary for enjoying and getting the most out of the experience on the "S" ships is one that is based on mood and maybe what the last trip was (or wasn't). A newcomer might want to select a string of brief introductory stops in places you either will want to visit for a week at a later time or alternatively to places that ½ day is enough but you're glad to have seen. Just three brief examples: Egypt by Silver Wind earlier this month was super, the pyramids were not crowed for reasons you know. Wanna go there on your own now? And what about sailing around Dinko Bay and watching the glacier that is the source of the Atlantic icebergs calving in NW Greenland in the midnight sun? Want to arrange that on your own. And of course, the "mindless Caribbean cruise" of last Winter was right for then. ("Maybe we'll get off again in St. Kitts. Maybe not.") See what I mean?

NOW THE THREE ANSWERS

Of course, the three questions are really the three worries. Who wants to pay big bucks and feel that reading a book is all you want or can do during a string of sea days. (You should be aware that the breathtaking brochure price is discounted to a fraction for everyone, and the total cost is really not that much per day than a nice cabin on a mass market line if you consider that the luxury lines provide all inclusive, gourmet food and wine, no tipping, usually free alternative dining, and essentially no extras. Even the few "S" lines that charge for excursions, say, now include an on-board spend how you please credit and most now include "free airfare")  Actually, sometimes reading a book by the pool is all you want to do—between meals and with some uniformed crew member bringing you a gin and tonic from time to time—but I know what you mean. These ships don't have surfing beaches, climbing walls, or many other mechanical diversions. But even the sea days can be quite busy, if that's your thing. The 296 guest smaller Silversea ships schedule cooking lessons and demonstrations by their culinary institute trained chefs. There's destination and enrichment lecturers on art, history, geo-politics, opera even, (oh yes, some enrichment lecturers are still very good—but not like the old days when the lecturers were fantastic and particularly handsome), martini or wine tasting, galley and navigation bridge tours, plus the usual and age old daily shipboard events of pool volley ball and table tennis "with the cruise staff", an ice cream social (whatever that is) on deck, yoga instruction, team trivia, etc., etc. Silversea  has a resident "International Hostess" who even schedules daily language lessons with a rotating scheme of four or five of the most popular. Even the little ships have a health club (with personal trainer available), a spa and beauty salon, a casino, card room (often with a resident bridge instructor couple), and of course there is entertainment most every night from visiting signers, violinists, or pianists, a cocktail pianist for tea time and in one of the pre-dinner lounges, a resident quartet or more musicians on the larger, but still small ships, and full shows every few days by the usual six member on board "troupe" of talented young and oh, so enthusiastic performers. After a while, you skip the shows and watch the stars. Sometimes there's even an astronomer enrichment lecturer. There's even something called, "disco" or "discus", late at night, I'm told. I skip that, as I also avoid the early morning escorted "power" walk on the jogging track, presumably for folks who might get lost on the circuit. There's also a more or less extensive library of mostly best sellers and non-fiction, full copies of a couple of dozen international newspapers, and a bunch of video on demand or physical DVDs. No, you don't get bored. The danger is overdoing, even on the small ships.

The 2^nd worry, uh question, is about mal de mer. Yes, we've all seen those pictures of pianos crashing around a ballroom on some ship (go to "Cruise from Hell" on YouTube), and many of us—me especially—turn green if I attempt to read The Onion on the bus. Seasickness is not anyone's fun. But, in my almost two years of being on these smaller ships, I've resorted to taking the non-lactose Walamine four times total. I found that typing a blog when the ship is noticeably moving is a bad idea. That's it. Four times of feeling less than perfect in 650 or so days on the sea. And then, the pill worked. I slept until the seas calmed down. Some people wear those continuous dose ear patch thingies, but fortunately fewer and fewer believe that a magnet or a piece of towel wrapped around ones wrist does anything useful.

Most of the time there is no noticeable sensation of movement, much less of pitching. Remember, even the small ships are in the double digit tens of thousands of tons (or tonnes, which are bigger and very European and stylish I believe). By the way, there usually is no large side to side rolling on these ships even in quite trouble seas due to the nifty stabilizer wings that emerge as soon as the ship is underway, and even full ocean crossings often seem like small ponds. Yes, occasionally you KNOW you are floating on perhaps a troubled sea, but that doesn't mean you get sick. (Looking out the window and getting air on deck does help under these circumstances, by the way.) Just don't pick a North Atlantic crossing in March or some other more motion prone itineraries. Perhaps avoid the Tasman Sea during your first cruise. Cruise travel agents--that is, those agents who specialize in cruises or better still luxury cruises--know what to avoid, or ask me (include money with your request).

Sure, everyone can get motion sickness—in a car, train, airplane (they don't put those bags there just for all the stuff they say they will but don't pick up before landing), or even in a boat—but there is less exposure to problems in a cruise ship than any of the above. Some people take a day or so to stop telling each other that "the ship is moving" sometimes, but they get over saying that. OK, do you feel any better?

Before I proceed to the dress up question, let me address a potential fourth question. What about overeating? Come on now. Do you overeat at home? Enjoy the cruise. Actually, the "S" cruise line guests are pretty used to getting what they want, when they want it, at home—or at least having it available. The food onboard the ships is truly gourmet, but fortunately even lately with some upsizing, the portions are appropriate even when the courses are many. For all it's worth, I LOST ½ pound during the recent 22 day cruise. I attribute this to thinking about the one hour, 10 minute connection time in Frankfurt for the flight home from Nice, but it was probably due to not snacking and walking extensively in ports and on the jogging track. (You can even get some running in by pointing out to sea and saying, "Whale",  when there isn't one and then trying to keep ahead of the crowd.)

Lastly, what about that tuxedo thing?

Every time I wear the (now hand tied) bowtie and dinner jacket I look in the mirror and say that that's the best I'll ever look again. Silversea has a couple or three formal nights per cruise ("business suits are acceptable"), but some of the others stay with Resort Casual ("shirt with collar and long pants") or are mostly Informal ("jacket, tie optional"). It's no big deal, really, and it is very nice to dress up. Tuxedos can be rented by the week at home, and you'll look better than you ever will again.

Hope this helps. As a former US president said, "I did it because I could." That's why I do the cruise—the "can" part, not the cigar part that is, but mostly because it is a fantastic existential experience. Even with the occasional bozo who could buy and sell me in a second, the busboy who asks me for the (literally) 66^th time if I wanted still or bubbly water, and the strange habits of groups or families traveling together. Luxury cruises have changed my life, more than once, and I would find myself planning the next one after (or almost after) getting over the jet lag from the previous one.

MB

Boulder, CO

SCENES FROM THE FLIGHTS

A Glimpse of Monte Carlo and Nice is, uh, Nice

Saturday, 9 July 2011, Boulder, Colorado, USA

Thursday, 7 July 2011 - Monte Carlo and Nice

The last day of a cruise is always a pain. There's that packing thing, the exchange of emails with the other guests, a feeling of feigned comradeship (or is it a feigned feeling of comradeship rather), and the very difficult saying of good-byes to the wonderful staff, really! We went one last time to the Observation Lounge to, uh, observe the sailing in and docking right across from the famed casino at Monte Carlo. The ship was flying the Monaco flag (good) and, oddly enough, the EU flag (bad in this case since Monaco isn't in the EU although it is in the "euro-zone" and member of Swangen Treaty--look these up if you must). Of course, the ever present Waldo Flag was on top of the mast.

We were whisked to nearby Nice and the top rated but remarkably dowdy looking Airport Novatel Hotel where we waited for 45 minutes to be whisked again around the corner to the actual top rated Novatel Suites Hotel where we had booked one night. We checked our bags as the room wasn't ready yet, ("Non, non, non, monsieur"), and headed across the street via 5 or 6 pedestrian crossings to the very close as the pigeon flies railway station for the one stop ride to downtown Nice, the capital of the Cote d'Azur. Nice is, uh, well you get it. The walk to the old town, picture of which is included above from the top of the free but oddly smelling ascenseur, was pretty nifty--especially with the wide expanse of riviera typically all rock but nice beach going back all the way to the aeroport. We had a nice lunch of something sans fromage ou beurre and took a bunch of pictures that were identical to those in this month's Lufthansa magazine. Go figure, could have saved all those bytes. We went back to the Nice-Ville train station via very modern tram but had to endure the very ennui prone and all smoking young ladies at the station during the wait for the "retard" train, the most popular type en France. I did see the nicest looking railroad conductor I've encountered in all my travels. We rested up at the hotel, now having made at least an additional dozen death defying crossings of that one little intersection to get to and from the hotel from the very nearby railway station (they are all named "gare", making it very difficult to get around by train which they don't call "chemin de fer" anymore as I was taught in high school) to check in and rest up a while before heading out again. This time to the fabled and very lovely town of Villefranche which is about half way back to Monaco. This town, now unfortunately the darling of the large cruise ships who use it as one of their only tendering ports, could be a movie set for the Cote d'Azur. Well, it was a matter of fact the setting of "An Affair to Remember", the Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr film of 1957. Even the train station at Villefranche looks romantic.

We lingered in Villefranche sur Mer (named for the fact that it is on the sea, apparently, as those wacky French don't miss a trick) long enough for most of the 10,000 cruise ship passengers to take their orange roofed tenders back to the Mouse (Disney Magic had somehow reappeared after we thought we had successfully Donald'ed it in Civitavecchia), the Royal Caribbean something "of the Seas" (Chicken, I think), and another big cruise ship with an unreadable name. We were quite successful in this ploy as the town quieted down enough for a long (and costly) glass of wine. We took the quick but still very crowded train back to the airport and crossed the now 8 death defying pedestrian crossings to our adjacent to the train station hotel. We had dinner at the only restaurant nearby, adjacent to the hotel's pool where one of the guests was enjoying the hotel's amenities, all too much I believe.

Friday, 8 July 2011 - almost 6000 miles of Lufthansa.

The flights were all right, we made the 45 minute connection in Frankfort as did our luggage, and encountered the usual and recurrent, "Non, non, non, monsieur" enough time to choke a chemin de fer. Speaking of choking, we breathed enough second hand cigarette smoke on our 24 hours en France to choke and did or at least coughed a lot. Then the friendly Lufthansa clerks at the NCE airport charged me 60 euro for checking a 2nd bag (that necessitated waiting in three more queues) that the friendly Lufthansa clerk in the USA said was included for us as United Premier status Mileage Plus members, and then the friendly Airport Club clerk denied us entry (all together now, "non, non, non, monsieur") that the Lufthansa website was available to Red Carpet Club members. Voltaire said, "I love mankind. It's people I can't stand.". I think I love France, it's French people who.... At any rate, well 550 mph ground speed, we endured the remarkably good service in Economy (maybe because of the free German beer and French wine, or was it the other way around) and arrived in Denver after deviating to well west of Laramie, Wyoming (to avoid thunderstorms and possibly to endure yet another 10 minute announcement in German) just 10 hours after taking off at FRA and 13 hours after the half hour delayed takeoff (with a scheduled 1 hour 10 minute layover at Frankfort). I was not relaxed on the trip home.

We arrived home by 5:30 pm. Might have been earlier if US Customs hadn't decided to subject Barbara's luggage and passport to extra vigilance--as usual.


THIS IS NOT THE LAST ENTRY.

Stay tuned. I will be putting up a bunch of pictures, including the habits of very rich few on the ship who embarrassed the rest of us, a number of candid shots of Peterson's at play and play, and some new real insights about high level cruising. I might even have something new to say about the Australian Group!

Give me a few days to get my head clear...

Again, thanks for your nice comments.

Mike
Boulder, CO, USA

Napoleon said here, "I Think I'll Try Again"

Wednesday, 6 July 2011 - Portoferraio, Elba, Italy
Napoleon had a nice house (somehow made out of two windmills) here. He
was given a government job here and told to stay out of trouble. He
lived here for a while and then decided to go out and conquer the
world again. Unfortunately, he went to Belgium and met an English guy
named Wellington or was it Nelson or maybe both. We went out this
morning and visited his city house (he had another one outside of town
too) and walked through the quite picturesque port city of
Portoferraio, named for the iron mines dating back to Etruscan times, and then to the local busy but narrow pebbly beach. The life guide was
reading a magazine. We even found a cash machine that worked. This is
very usual for Italy. When we got back, our suitcases were out from
wherever they had hid and had been cleaned by our butler.

By Any Other Name

It's PORTO CERVO where we are. Sorry about the misspelling. (Who me?) Sardinia, by the way, should not be judged by this substitute anchorage. From what I know, this Italian island is spectacularly beautiful. Besides wonderful beaches and quaint towns, Sardinia is known for a number of mountain railways which may or not be running for passengers. Had the captain known of the swell and/or wind issues, perhaps this stop might have been changed and tours offered. But, hey, one can't complain about spending the afternoon in such a beautiful if pretentious place.

Again, much more about Silversea when we get back home as there won't be much time with a full day tomorrow enjoying the sight(s) of Elba and of course packing. Might take less time if we don't ask the butler to do it. He wouldn't have to shine all those shoes again....